Nag, Nag, Nag
An attorney got home very late one evening after a very long,taxing day trying to get a stay of execution for a client named Samuel Wright who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last-minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling tired and depressed.
As soon as he got through the door his wife started on him, "What time of night do you call this? Where the hell have you been?" and so on. Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a very large whiskey and headed off to the bathroom for a long hot soak -- pursued by his wife making her predictable sarcastic remarks.
While he was in the bath the phone rang, which the wife answered only to be told that her husband's client had been granted his stay of execution after all. Realizing what a day he must have had, she relented a little and went in to the bathroom to give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door she was greeted by the sight of her husband's rear end as he bent naked over the bath cleaning the tub.
"They're not hanging Wright tonight." she said.
The attorney whirled 'round and shouted hysterically, "For crying out loud, don't you ever stop?"
As soon as he got through the door his wife started on him, "What time of night do you call this? Where the hell have you been?" and so on. Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a very large whiskey and headed off to the bathroom for a long hot soak -- pursued by his wife making her predictable sarcastic remarks.
While he was in the bath the phone rang, which the wife answered only to be told that her husband's client had been granted his stay of execution after all. Realizing what a day he must have had, she relented a little and went in to the bathroom to give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door she was greeted by the sight of her husband's rear end as he bent naked over the bath cleaning the tub.
"They're not hanging Wright tonight." she said.
The attorney whirled 'round and shouted hysterically, "For crying out loud, don't you ever stop?"
posted by ironcross11 | 7:59 PM
1 Comments:
Took a second or two, but Hahahahahahahaahahahaha! Good one.
Rigth back atcha:
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From
morning til night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about
something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with
his old mule.
He tried to plow a lot.
One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field.
He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat
his lunch. Immediately, his wife began nagging him again. Complain, nag,
complain, nag; it just went on and on.
All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet, caught her
smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot.
At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather
odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for
a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached
him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement.
This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it.
So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him
why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head
and disagreed with all the men.
The old farmer said, "Well, the women would come up and say something about
how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in
agreement."
"And what about the men?" the minister asked.
"They wanted to know if the mule was for sale."
Post a Comment
<< Home